More Like Christ
I'm surrounded by people who are unlike me. I'm in contact and communication with people who don't look like me, who don't aspire to the same goals I do, who have vastly different backgrounds, who were born in very different places. Name a physical, sociological, mental, economic or spiritual characteristic of a person and I can find it my neighborhood.
This incredible diversity fuels me. It's one of the main reasons we moved to New York City. This diversity also overwhelms me. There is so much I do not know. There is so much I do not understand. In my effort to strive to be more like Christ I'm on a quest to learn and understand more about my neighbors.
It's under this premise that I believe Brokeback Mountain is such an important movie. It has become for me a resource to learn more and understand better the plight of homosexuals. Through the characters, Jack and Enis, I'm made aware that behind our conversations about the "issue of homosexuality" are real people who live in angst due to the intolerance that permeates our culture.
Brokeback Mountain raised my awareness that I still have a long way to go in my quest for the compassion of Christ as it probed uncomfortable depths of my soul. I realized in the watching of the film that my love for all of God's creatures is far from complete. In other words, I was indicted as being one who has allowed intolerance to permeate our culture. I appreciate Brokeback Mountain because it woke me from my slumber and is forcing me to interact with those characteristics of God - unbiased love, unmerited grace, undefinable compassion - that I would rather ignore.
I think this movie is an important piece of art in which we should all engage for the sake of Christ, for the sake of all of God's creatures.
This incredible diversity fuels me. It's one of the main reasons we moved to New York City. This diversity also overwhelms me. There is so much I do not know. There is so much I do not understand. In my effort to strive to be more like Christ I'm on a quest to learn and understand more about my neighbors.
It's under this premise that I believe Brokeback Mountain is such an important movie. It has become for me a resource to learn more and understand better the plight of homosexuals. Through the characters, Jack and Enis, I'm made aware that behind our conversations about the "issue of homosexuality" are real people who live in angst due to the intolerance that permeates our culture.
Brokeback Mountain raised my awareness that I still have a long way to go in my quest for the compassion of Christ as it probed uncomfortable depths of my soul. I realized in the watching of the film that my love for all of God's creatures is far from complete. In other words, I was indicted as being one who has allowed intolerance to permeate our culture. I appreciate Brokeback Mountain because it woke me from my slumber and is forcing me to interact with those characteristics of God - unbiased love, unmerited grace, undefinable compassion - that I would rather ignore.
I think this movie is an important piece of art in which we should all engage for the sake of Christ, for the sake of all of God's creatures.
posted by jch at
12:25 PM
10 Comments:
Joe, thanks for engaging us in that conversation. I, too, saw Brokeback Mountain and was incredibly moved by this movie. It was a beautifully done movie with an incredible message. I was sobbing at the end of the movie and quite unexpectedly. I have to tell you this long story that goes with the weekend that I saw Brokeback Mountain. I will try to make this as short as possible. I went with a friend to Florida for several days of relaxation...but the two of us always encounter adventure in the process of seeking relaxation. We went to our favorite massage therapist and in the process of waiting for our massages struck up conversation with two women who were also waiting for massages. One of them had just suffered loss in the murder of her neighbor. They were so friendly and warm and intelligent and we all just felt like natural friends. The one who had just suffered the loss invited us to come in a couple of days to a kite festival. We went to the kite festival and met her and her friends. We realized pretty quickly that they were a group of very closely knit lesbian women...they were a family who cared for each other and looked out for each other. They taught us how to fly a two-stringed kite and we had a great day on the beach with them. We invited them to have lunch with us and they accepted. Conversation was great and we talked about many things...relationships, children, religion, metaphysical healing, and our jobs. I went to the bathroom at the end of the meal and two of the women came to the bathroom after me. They didn't know that I was in the bathroom and one of them was angry. She thought that my friend and I were a couple and she felt like she had been mislead. Her friend asked if she wished she hadn't had lunch with us and she said...no, it was great and conversation was wonderful and I really like them both...I just thought they were one of us. Obviously they didn't know that I was in the stall. We talked more after lunch and they laughed about the mix-up and we still enjoyed each other's company. I believe that there haven't been many times that straight women have befriended them and they didn't know how to take us. This all happened the day after we went to see Brokeback Mountain... I believe that God was speaking to us through that whole weekend.
Thanks for the post Joe and I really enjoyed the other comments. This topic has also been on my heart and mind this week in light of the SoulForce visit to ACU. I am curious Joe if you know anything of their visit to A&M?
What strikes me about Jesus is -- the Bible gives us many examples of Jesus loving people that lived on the fringes of society (the woman at the well). Many of these folks were so taken by his love they repented and changed. They left their life of sin and became a disciple of Jesus. So, how do we respond and how does this issue fit into this equation? We are Jesus to the world, and, hopefully the world sees Jesus in us - but what then? Do we hope for repentance at some point, or do we just continue to seek to be more loving?
I was surprised when I saw that 'Brokeback Mountain' was indeed one of your recommended movies to view, but I understand where you're coming from.
As with so many issues in our society, although I may not agree with the opposing viewpoint, I'm not going to be the one casting judgment on the saved and those that will perish.
As someone with gay and bisexual family members, I always think about what my Granny would say time and time again, "Hate the sin, but love the sinner."
I also admire the fact that you have "Malcom X" as a recommended book-man, Joe, when you say you're down for diversity, you really mean it.
I'm diggin the fact that you like the sojourners website, too, because that's a good site to show people that all evangelical Christians are not staunch conservatives!
Your family is in my prayers daily. May God bless you and keep you.
My brother is gay and I'm astonished that some people can't see that he's a funny, loving person who goes to great lengths to help and support others. I can't tell you how good it feels to read this post and the comments here, you all renew my hope for more understanding and acceptance in this country. I'm not sure how loving someone is a sin.
As always each of you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Reading these comments further illuminates for me the power of this movie. Brokeback Mountain revealed sympathy and compassion within myself on a gut level. The movie took me from the intellectual discussion about homosexuality to an personal connection with two people who loved and hurt. In Jack and Ennis story I find the stories of countless other people who live and exist within a complicated world and with complicated relationships regardless of their sexual orientation.
As a Christian I came away from the movie being convicted that I should be slow to speak, and even slower to make conclusions about people. You just don't know the burden's and secrets people carry with them, and as a Christian I need to be a person who can be perceived as being able to receive those burdens and secrets with tenderness, compassion, and love. To be thought of as any other way distorts the one I purport to represent, Jesus Christ.
Not all experience is good. My first husband was a Christ-follower, and all-sexual, i.e., knew no boundaries. I don't know that I will ever be able to watch "Brokeback" w/o being taken back to that excruciatingly painful part of my life.
It is a difficult line to draw when loving the sinner, and not the sin. The danger is that one crosses over to tolerance, then acceptance, then embracing the sin. Think not? We have already done that with "little sins", like those that harm the body: smoking, drinking, gluttony; the tongue: swearing, gossip; dress, etc. Even bringing them up makes me sound like an old prude. I am not. I have no doubt that I overeat, dress inappropriately, speak unkindly, would drink - but it would kill me, and the list goes on and on. Should I just give in to them? No. But I have clearly closed my eyes and heart to some of them so that I can continue in my sins, as I have done with others so that they can continue in their sins.
I believe Jesus would say to all of these, "Go, and sin no more." Why can't we do that, 'as you go on your way, sin no more'? Why can't we say that? That isn't lacking love, that IS love.
Joe,
I’ve struggled for quite some time about whether or not I should respond to this post. On one hand I think your post is fantastic. I am also encouraged by the responses it has received by Church of Christ folks who agree, or are willing to dialogue with your perspective. I am moved deeply by your passion to learn and understand your neighbors, and the way you use that term in its broadest sense (And who is my neighbor?).
I think your response of compassion is compelling, and your quest for understanding deeply moving. It is fantastic to hear language like this coming from Church of Christ circles, and from a fellow classmate. The Soulforce visit at ACU this very week was also a step, abeit a small one, in the right direction. Compassion is a good start, it is much further along than most, and I certainly welcome a compassionate ear willing to understand my life, and the life of my domestic partner (A marriage by any other name…), friends, and community. It should also be noted that you have not made a claim as to whether or not homosexuality is a sin. I will assume for a moment that you may, or that most of your readers do believe homosexuality to be a sin, sinful condition, etc.
As a Christian who is Gay and an ordained minister, compassion is not enough.
Compassion toward those who are homosexual and cautiousness to speak are admirable and welcome qualities. Another former classmate, J-Wild said many things well in his response that was similar to your post, and I appreciated his response. However, and I can only speak for myself. In my experience, speaking to someone who is compassionate and seeks understanding is all well and good, but if they think you are a “sinner” or inherently wrong, or think that homosexuality is what God didn’t and would never intend underneath, then I still feel discrimination. I would dare say I am not alone in this perspective. A understanding ear is fine, but if I am talking with someone, and at the very foundational level they think that I am living in sin, or that the way God’s image is created within me is sinful (and I would say God’s image includes modes of relationality of all kinds) then I am still experiencing discrimination. I am still not regarded as fully human as God intended. I am not fully Christian either. In that sense, if a compassionate ear listens, and continues in the belief that homosexuality is a sin, then the compassionate ear still contributes to the environment and culture that Jack and Enis struggled against (and under) in the movie. The point is we are not flawed due to the color of our skin, the gender we inhabit or change, our national or ethnic origin, our abilities or disabilities, or our sexual orientation. While most would agree with categories of race and gender that at one time were regarded as flawed, sinful, and less than God intended, the lesson from the past does not yet apply to homosexuals.
It has been a blessing, and I have felt most free in a denomination and a church that accepts me as fully human. I have felt most free when others regard my orientation like theirs, a neutral characteristic (not sinful) of their being. There’s no agenda, no need to change, no underlying belief that I need to be any different (with regards to sexual orientation) than I already am. Until this point is reached by many people and clergy in the Church of Christ, a compassionate ear will contribute to tolerance, but not acceptance. Homosexuals will remain second class, and those with compassion will still contribute to a hostile environment. Regarding someone’s immutable and God given characteristics (of race, gender, orientation, etc…) as sinful in any way is an act of hostility.
Thanks for your post and your understanding. I would much rather talk with someone who wished to listen and hear of homosexual experience than someone who feels as if their mind is made up and they have all the answers. Your post is very good. I hope you understand I could not let it pass without adding this input.
Reed
Some great and thoughtful posts here. I hope you’ll allow me to humbly add my take. First, I hate to follow Reed’s comments because mine won’t address the heavier topics and issues he raises. (Reed - Thanks for your thoughts and your perspective.) Instead, I’m going to focus on the idea Joe raised originally. Second, these are my views and I don’t take issue with those who don’t share them.
I agree with Joe’s premises on the need for compassion and the need for ministry to everyone regardless of boundaries and where they are, physically, socially, or spiritually. I also agree on the need to engage and listen. I just (personally) don’t know that my seeing Brokeback is a requisite to my ability to minister, interact, socialize, or reach out to someone who is gay. I know, and am friends with, people who are gay, and am not sure that 2 hours of a Hollywood movie is needed for me to be able connect with them.
That being said, I was especially irritated (maybe that’s the wrong word) by the way this particular movie was marketed and the political push behind it. I’ve seen plenty of movies and TV programs that have gay character and themes. But none (that I can recall) where the producers, directors, authors, and actors so publicly pushed the movie as being a vehicle for changing America. Plus, critics and those backing the movie cite the box office returns for this movie as demonstrating America’s willing to embrace a “gay love story.” While I certainly throw my dollars at movie that endorse values that I don’t like, it’s just not usually for a movie where the returns are being so carefully watched and linked to public endorsement.
Reed:
Wow it's been a while since we were plate schlepping our way through school at good old Cypress Street in Abilene. Man that Thai Chicken salad was amazing right?
First one last thing about the movie. Perhaps I am being hard headed, but I just don't peg Brokeback Mountain as being a movie just about two discriminated and fearful homosexuals. The vehicle used to convey the story happens within the frame work of a homosexual relationship, but the emotions, conflict, prejudice, love, and fear conveyed in the movie are universal. And each person who makes it on screen experiences these things to one degree or another. I do not believe that this movie is wanting to push a homosexual agenda (whatever that is). It's agenda is showing life's complications, joy, brokenness, and sorrow. That is universal, gay or straight!
Let me say that I readily admit a lack of expertise and nuance in my ability to theologically flush out some of my thoughts in response to your comment. And I also want to say that this comment leaves a lot of very important issues regarding homosexuality and the church untouched. But these are just my personal thoughts and reflections on a topic that I am seeking greater understanding about. And your excellent and challenging comment warrants a response.
Years and years ago there was a kid in my youth group who came to a point in (his/her) life where they felt like they had two choices. Either A they could accept their identity as a homosexual and subsequently never step foot in church again. Or B they could never fully act or express who they were, but continue to have community with their church. Of course this debate raged inside them without a word being spoken to anyone.
The person choose A. Since they felt like they were done with God in their life (or that God was done with them) this person threw themselves into dangerous and careless behaviors. These choices have had and will continue to have the severest of consequences for this young person.
I will tell you what I wish I could have said, had I known what was going on in this persons mind. I would have said that no matter what choice you make the physical, emotional, and spiritual damage that sex can have on a persons life is as real for the homosexual as it is for the heterosexual. Regardless of sexual orientation sex is an intensely personal and emotional event and to think of it as anything else belittles and cheapens it. Secondly you are never outside of the church and most importantly God's love. Lets take the time to examine the theological and spiritual ramifications of homosexuality. Perhaps we both will be surprised where we end up.
I was never able to voice that to this person. I think it would have made a difference. Not in their homosexuality, but in their perceived access to God, which is the more important of the two by far.
Reed, for me and in my particular pastoral situation I am much more concerned and disheartened by our society's collective view of sex than with homosexuality. To me the teen who tells me that they are gay, but have chosen not to be sexually active until they meet a person they know they will spend the rest of their life with is much more on target with God's will than the straight teen who is very sexually active and cavalier about the emotional and spiritual ramifications of acting in such a way.
I believe, and my understanding is that sex outside of marriage between a man and a women doesn't meet the ideal standards of God. I believe sincerely that God's intention has been and will always be for sex to happen within a committed, loving, and faithful marriage between a husband and wife. And that sex greatest power is to be found in it's function of creating life not just in it's mutual physical and emotional gratification. However, I also believe in my experience with Jesus and scripture that God transcends all expectations in His ability to accept and bless people who don't or can't live up to His ideal. My life is a testimony to that everyday.
I am not saying that the person who doesn't live up to the ideal is a second class citizen. On the whole who among us can even begin to say they live up to God's ideal. We are all second class citizens to Jesus Christ and to our neighbors. I would expect you to treat your partner with the same faithfulness, love, respect, candor, and commitment that I show towards my wife. And you should expect the same of me.
I am sure you strongly disagree with me, and that no matter how carefully I craft my words they possibly still sting with criticism and judgment. Yet I believe that in this theological disagreement we can still come to the table to break bread in communion with our God and share in the salvation of the Lord Jesus Christ. And that heaven can receive the both of us into life eternal despite our different understandings of scripture.
Jason,
You just had to bring up that Thai Chicken Salad, didn’t you? My mouth is watering thinking about it. Do you think Cypress Street delivers to Detroit?
Your words do not sting with criticism and judgment, and I hope you did not read my response to Joe’s post as reactionary. You’re response is both thoughtful and intelligent. It is also full of heart. I would welcome continued dialogue with you, should you so desire, regardless of agreement or disagreement. Truth is discovered often in dialectic. I also agree and would affirm wholeheartedly that we can come to table and break bread in our similarities and disagreements, in communion with the Divine and one another. I agree with your assessment of Brokeback Mountain. It is a human story, and it is all that you say it is. I chose to highlight one of the many themes in the movie to illustrate my point. ((Aside: It is and is not a homosexual story and involves the difficulties of a homosexual relationship. Michael and I, like Enis, are keenly aware that “if this thing gets a hold of us in the wrong place and at the wrong time, we’re dead.” I’m not sure you can understand this, after all you and your wife can show affection by holding hands, or in simple but tasteful gestures just about anywhere. We are keenly aware that if we do a violent reaction could result. Do we live in fear? Absolutely not, we’re out, proud, and unashamed about our relationship even at the grocery store. Yet this is a reality of our existence as it was for Enis and Jack.)) I also agree with you about our culture’s distorted perception of sex and sexuality, regardless of orientation.
I’m sorry to hear about the person that was once in your youth group. I hope that he may one day find a community of faith that affirms him, and figures out that the decision between God and Sexual Orientation is a false dichotomy.
Where we differ is on our perspective of what is “ideal.” The nuance of this point is slight but will hopefully become clear. You believe that God’s ideal sexual expression takes place between husband and wife for both mutual gratification and procreation. Anything less is not ideal but able to be blessed by God and accepted. I believe that God’s ideal sexual and relational expression takes place between two human beings in monogamous relationship, regardless of gender. The ideal biblically and theologically as I believe is two men, two women, or a man and a woman in mutual self-giving and sacrificing love under the guidance of the Holy Trinity.
Here’s the nuance. The belief that one is ideal, and the other is not quite ideal but not beyond God’s blessing, in and of itself is discriminatory. At one time people of different races were not considered by certain strands of Christianity to be ideal. All people were considered to be created in God’s image, but some were considered ideal and others not. We know the results of such thinking by a simple examination of our how history toward different races. In the Churches of Christ there is a struggle for gender equality. Women were assigned certain roles. It was believed that God’s ideal for a minister (or office holder) of the church should be occupied by males-- exclusively. As such, those who were considered less than ideal, women, were highly valued, but treated as not quite equal. Various modes of discrimination based on gender resulted and the struggle in Churches of Christ continues to this day. While I welcome you as a fellow Christian and we can and must break bread together, the idea that a homosexual relationship is not ideal but still blessed leads to the same time of discrimination. In effect it does result in second-class citizenship either in our culture or the church at large. Any time theological or God language is used to express that a person’s God given immutable characteristics are less than what God designed (or intended, or is ideal, or is slightly outside of God’s perfect plan) leads eventually to a place of dehumanization. I know you would never say that someone who does not live up to the ideal is second-class, but the idea that a person or a relationship is not ideal is making that person or relationship second-class. It becomes that way by the very nature of the belief itself. Lest you think this is an argument for a “slippery slope” it is quite the contrary. It’s not a far reach to say someone or something is less than ideal and then lead to removing, undervaluing, or persecuting the ideal by those who see themselves as God intended them to be. Even if those who hold this belief recognize that the struggles of the majority are similar to that of the minority. I’m not sure you can understand, perhaps you have to be a minority to understand this point. The belief that one is “To be blessed but/and not part of the ideal standards of God” makes the belief discriminatory in its very nature. The result be it slight or great in degree makes us second-class. I say this so you may understand, not as an accusation.
I am not sure I’ve explicated clearly the nuance; it is slight but highly significant.
Any response or dialogue via this medium or another is welcomed and valued. I hope you will feel welcomed to the table of conversation.
Finally, allow me to quote St. Augustine’s infamous quote at the foundation of both of our faith traditions: “In essentials unity, in doubtful things liberty, but in all things love.”
Reed
(Response at my blog as well)
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